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I have the plague/pox/whatever.

No updates recently as after a short while of nothing to report, I achieved entry into the third trimester club. Sadly, the same day I also came down with a horrible viral chest infection and have been bedridden since. Boooo… There will be a bump update photo as soon as I’ve stopped looking like a haggard old lady in pyjamas.

I went to the doctors a) to get a sick note, but mostly because b) I was coughing so hard I thought I could injure Prawn in some way or induce early labour. The good news? Apparently not – hurrah! (yes, I am a neurotic first-time Mum sometimes)

The only positive thing about this experience is that Prawn freaked the dog out. How? I was watching a movie in bed and Boris was snuggled up to my bump sleeping. Prawn decided to try out her Kung-Fu moves and kicked Boris in the ribs, waking him up and causing him to be most alarmed. As my lovely Boris’ normal state of being is confused, the alarm wore off quickly and he fell asleep again, just not on the bump. 

The reason I say that the dog being freaked out is a positive, is that he was leading in those stakes this week after he freaked me out by licking my (pyjama-clad) boob after I leaked boob juice in bed. He’s not usually a “licky” dog and IT WAS MY BOOB. Gross. 

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Gah! Hormones! Drama!

Well, as anyone who knows me in person can vouch, I can have some good hormonal mood swings and things like the best of them even before I was pregnant.

Suffice to say that this whole “growing a little human” thing has ramped it up significantly – last night I got so angry at a turd of a cardiologist at work that I had to give the phone to someone else so I could cry the wave of anger and frustration out as I was becoming unintelligible on the phone and may have (rather unprofessionally, I am aware) called the cardiologist an obnoxious liar. Then I cried because I felt my patient was getting shitty care by the doctors and there was nothing I could do to make it better. Urgh, I was one blotchy, snotty creature.

(n.b. the patient was eating an icy-pole/ice lolly and was watching The Simpsons at this point and didn’t see any of this)

It’s frustrating not to have my usual cut off switch working – normally I would have been pissed off, but able to manage it calmly and professionally. This is similar to being a blooming teenager again, but with more tears and I don’t like it.

 

Now, at the request of my best friend AML, some gory bits. Except, there really aren’t any to report at the moment (although my crying face is pretty gory) as things seem physically ok at the moment. The bump is getting bigger, so are my boobs, and if I’m entirely honest, so is the rest of me. This might be more to do with the dietary supplements I’ve been taking for my mental health – i.e. large bars of Toblerone – than anything else though. So, unless you count the sight of my ever-expanding bum as gory, I’m afraid it’s a no go on the gore front.

Third trimester is coming up scarily soon though, and I’m promised that this will all change. Gory bits ahoy, Captain Lenon!

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Hooray!

So, my self-diagnosis was awry  – today my blood pressure was normal, my wee clear of everything bad and I felt like a bit of a fraud. Still, I had blood tests (yay) and I’m booked next week to make a “mental health plan” to access a psychologist paid for by Medicare (Aussie NHS).

The doctor recommended I relax more and possibly reduce my hours at work too. I’m back at pregnancy yoga this week, so I’ll see if that makes a difference.

For the rest of my Friday, I am going to drop off the toilet seat and last key to our old real estate agent and hopefully that’s our bond back. She’s a freaking nightmare – she thinks our cleaning products have left the old toilet seat too rough (it’s plastic) and no, I’m not kidding it needs replacing. Considering we use Earth Choice gentle cleaning stuff as Kim’s got fragile asthma, I have no idea what she’s on about. She is mental about cleanliness though, and possibly other things too – the antithesis of our new agent who is so relaxed he’s horizontal.

I’m also going to buy more tins of tuna, as I just had a winning tuna mayonnaise sandwich with jalapenos and gherkins before and it was divine. Oh, and probably have a big nap too. Mmmmmmm, naps.